Dear you,
Hey! Welcome! Stay a while!
Sincerely,
Bored...
Dear Velvet (cat),
"WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU EATING?"
"oh.....it's just food..."
Sincerely,
It sounded a lot worse than that...
Dear Car,
Dashboard's working again all of a sudden? Thanks!
Sincerely,
Bank Account
Dear House Beautiful Magazine,
pay me soon.
Sincerely,
9 hours a day in 99 degree weather deserves $$$$$
Dear Rainboots,
Come hereeeeeeeee!!!!! I ruv you.
Sincerely,
dry socks
Dear refrigerator,
Why can't you make your own food?
Sincerely,
Hungrryyyyyyyyy
Dear fingers,
suck it up!!!!!
Sincerely,
Guitar
Dear Erika,
It's because I love you
Sincerely,
Car
And these are some written by people who know what they're doing:
Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving till 5.
Sincerely,
Unicorns
Dear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection. Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely,
Logic
Dear Yahoo,
I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo! it..." just saying...
Sincerely,
Google
Dear Scissors,
I feel your pain.....no one wants to run with me either.
Sincerely,
Sarah Palin
{ooooooooohhh this is baaddd}
Dear World of Warcraft,
Thank you for ensuring my son's virginity.
Sincerely,
Parents Everywhere
Dear Batman,
What was your power again?
Sincerely,
Superman
Dear Customers,
Yes, we ARE making fun of you in Vietnamese.
Sincerely,
Nail Salon Ladies
{I KNEW IT!!!!}
Dear Ugly People,
You're welcome.
Sincerely,
Alcohol
Dear World,
Please stop freaking out about 2012.
Our calendars end there because some Spanish d-bags invaded our country and we got a little busy ok?
Sincerely,
The Mayans
Dear White People,
Don't you just hate immigrants?
Sincerely,
Native Americans
Dear iPhone,
Please stop spell checking all of my rude words into nice words. You piece of shut. Sincerely,
Every iPhone User
Dear Trash,
At least you get picked up...
Sincerely,
The Girls of Jersey Shore
Dear Man,
It's cute, but can you pick up peanuts with it?
Sincerely,
Elephant
And these are some written by people who know what they're doing:
Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving till 5.
Sincerely,
Unicorns
Dear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection. Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely,
Logic
Dear Yahoo,
I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo! it..." just saying...
Sincerely,
Dear Scissors,
I feel your pain.....no one wants to run with me either.
Sincerely,
Sarah Palin
{ooooooooohhh this is baaddd}
Dear World of Warcraft,
Thank you for ensuring my son's virginity.
Sincerely,
Parents Everywhere
Dear Batman,
What was your power again?
Sincerely,
Superman
Dear Customers,
Yes, we ARE making fun of you in Vietnamese.
Sincerely,
Nail Salon Ladies
{I KNEW IT!!!!}
Dear Ugly People,
You're welcome.
Sincerely,
Alcohol
Dear World,
Please stop freaking out about 2012.
Our calendars end there because some Spanish d-bags invaded our country and we got a little busy ok?
Sincerely,
The Mayans
Dear White People,
Don't you just hate immigrants?
Sincerely,
Native Americans
Dear iPhone,
Please stop spell checking all of my rude words into nice words. You piece of shut. Sincerely,
Every iPhone User
Dear Trash,
At least you get picked up...
Sincerely,
The Girls of Jersey Shore
Dear Man,
It's cute, but can you pick up peanuts with it?
Sincerely,
Elephant